i nc u u m m u n i i y w h ic h : uctooer 23,1996 Page 17 W h a t’s w it h a ll t h e s e c a r g a d g e ts ? Most people don't use ashtray for ashes anymore or pen holder for pe Since the invention of the automobile some 100 years ago, it would seem to me that cars now are quite the same as the originals in regard to the basics (engine, tires, oil and radiator). With the exception of the safety belt, the so-called “convenience items” now contained within the interiors of our cars make me begin to wonder if it wouldn’t be easier to revert to the olden days. In the workshop by M a u ra Cady The idea of becoming a projectile in the event of an accident became a real turn-off for me.
At the risk of saving my life, I gave up all hope of becoming a rocket scientist. Some 100 years ago, cars contained only the basics. As you look at the console of your car, take note of what you see. For years, car manufacturers have included something called an “ashtray.” The name “ashtray” is fine for those who smoke. But for people like me who don’t smoke, I find that, over time, my car’s ashtray gets filled with candy and straw wrappers. Since smoking and snacking are vices in their own class, I feel that the name “vicetray” would be more appropriate. The discrimination against us wrapper people would then be cleared up once and for all. Lastly, have you studied your car’s clock lately?
With the change back to Standard Time fast approaching, have you taken the time to ask yourself how in the world you’re going to reprogram your car’s digital clock? Before you attempt this dangerous feat, I would first suggest that you locate your owner’s manual (try looking in the trunk under the cooler and chairs from last summer’s family reunion). If your car is like mine, then your car’s clock is a cinch to program. Although I miss the days of the minuscule holes to stick a pin into, my car’s clock has two simple buttons; the “H” for “hour” and the “M” for “minute.” I couldn’t ask for more.
But, if you’re one of the unfortunate pin-type car clock programmers, let me say that you now have four days to find your programming pins — either that or you may want to start wearing your watch. Next, open your glove box. Is that convenient little pen holder inside your glove box without a pen? This holder is an idea with good intention but, honestly, do you return your “glove box pen” to its holder when you’re done? If you’re at all like me, this convenient pen has just ended up in your checkbook or your pocket. Or, does it even get that far? Be honest with yourself! How many pens turned up during your car’s annual or (I’ll give some of you credit) biannual cleaning?
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to conclude that car designers could spend their time creating a “glove box pen chain” instead! I’m sure there’s much more that I’ve missed, but I’m afraid I can’t continue. My car’s trip odometer has just revealed that this journey must come to an end. Speaking of rocket scientists, I’ve noticed an excessive amount of rocket scientist wanna-be’s while driving around town. These are the drivers and passengers who travel without the one sensible invention since the creation of the car; the safety belt. The freedom to go flying through the air when hit by another car may be a real turn-on for these people.
Fortunately, in my driving years I’ve never thought about making such a drastic career change. The crash films that I was exposed to in driver’s education some 15 years ago changed the direction of my life. G et the best deal! Enjoy flexible terms and low monthly payments on your next new or used car or truck. 8.50% a p r 9.25% a p r 1993-1996 models up to 60 months 1990-1992 models up to 48 months '- v*' T hese old, ru sty ca rs w eren ’t m uch fo r m odern-day conviences, b u t they w ere easy to operate. Do people really know how to use the fancy gadgets on new cars?
We’ll see when the tim e changes this weekend when many m otorists will scramble for their m anuals to see how to change the clock. (Crier photo by Rob Kirkbride) Plymouth 500 S. Harvey 313 453-1200 Canton 6355 N. Canton Center North ville/Novi 313 455-0400 400 E. Main 810 348-2920 Accounts federally insured to $100,000 by the NCUA, an agency of the U.S. Government. Equal Housing Lender. Rates as of 1 0 /1 /9 6 and subject to change.